Ep. 78: Speaking of Rape w/Rev. Dr. Danielle Tumminio Hansen
Show Notes
Episode Summary
[TW: sexual assault and sexual harm language and stories]
I am joined today by Rev. Dr. Danielle Tumminio Hansen to speak about the unspeakable. A theologian and Episcopal priest focusing on pastoral approaches to trauma, Hansen addresses the persistent crisis of sexual harm in the U.S., and the “haunting silence” of survivors. Why do most victims remain silent? Why don’t we trust women? Why do we assume perpetrators of sexual harm are strangers who jump out of bushes instead of trusted boyfriends, pastors, teachers, or family members? How does our society’s rape myths further silence victims of sexual harm?
In this unflinching conversation, we discuss the difficulty of coming up with the right language to describe sexual harm, how the words we use often cause even more harm, how our legal system, churches, media, and culture are complicit in rape culture, and the practical steps you can take to recover.
Talking about rape and sexual assault is difficult for a number of reasons. Victims often feel ashamed or stigmatized by society's attitudes towards sexual violence. There's a pervasive culture of victim-blaming, where survivors may fear they won't be believed or will be judged for what happened to them. Sexual violence can cause profound emotional and psychological trauma. Discussing the experience may trigger intense emotions, flashbacks, or other symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), making it incredibly challenging for survivors to talk about what happened.
So, why this book and why this episode on rape? Because talking about rape and sexual assault breaks down layers of stigma, trauma, fear, and systemic barriers. It also has a direct impact on how we process trauma. Creating safe spaces for survivors to share their experiences, offer support, and challenge societal norms are crucial steps towards fostering open and meaningful conversations about sexual violence.
Like many individuals, Hansen’s story of sexual violence didn’t come at the hands of a stranger, but rather by someone she knew, causing her to wonder if what happened to her really was sexual assault. “Statistically, you would be more likely to believe me if I said this person was someone I’d never met,” she writes. “Raised to believe stereotypes of what constituted ‘real rape’—forced intercourse in a physically violent attack by a male stranger—I did not have a word to express what had happened to me.” Now she does.
In this episode we discuss:
The rape myths of the “ideal” victim and “stranger perpetrator”
How purity culture and porn perpetuate rape culture
Why telling your story is liberating and healing
Moving beyond stigma and shame
The road to recovery—how art, contemplation, meditation, community, and therapy can restore your sense of self, trust, and agency.
Pick up Danielle’s book here. It is an amazing read.
Bio:
Danielle Tumminio Hansen is Associate Professor of Practical Theology and Spiritual Care at Emory’s Candler School of Theology, where she researches at the intersection of trauma, theology, narrative, and philosophy. Her book publications include Speaking of Rape: The Limits of Language in Sexual Violations and Conceiving Family: A Practical Theology of Surrogacy and Self. She has written on the intersection of religion and culture for a variety of national and international news outlets, including CNN, The Guardian, and Huffington Post. She is also an Episcopal priest.
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Credits
This episode was produced by The Sophia Society and written by Gary Alan Taylor. Music is by Faith in Foxholes.
Rape survivors need speech to recover--to tell the story of their harm, to rebuild their sense of self and their place in the world. But the words available to them often fail to describe their experience of the violation.