The Gospel of Deconstruction

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“These are the secret sayings which the living Jesus spoke and which Didymus Judas Thomas wrote down.”— The Gospel of Thomas

In 1945, an Egyptian peasant ventured into the desert in search of fertilizer, finding instead a rather large clay jar. Hoping it contained treasure, he broke it open to find that it did indeed contain treasure, just not the kind he was expecting. The jar had protected a treasure of wisdom that, once read, would reveal a new picture of Christianity in the first century. Inside was a collection of 12 ancient books that came to be known as the Nag Hammadi library. This find is still considered the greatest archaeological discovery of the twentieth century, primarily because among the books was the lost Gospel of Didymus Thomas (Didymus translates to “the twin”). Scholars believe it documents the oldest and most authentic sayings of the historical Jesus. 

It’s fitting that these ancient teachings lay hidden for centuries and unavailable to the greater Christian world because, in large part, they’ve been a secret ever since Jesus first uttered them. Like most first-century rabbis, Jesus taught one way in public and another in private. To the masses, he spoke in parables so that “hearing they may hear yet not understand.” In private to his disciples, he proclaimed, “To you is given the secret of the Kingdom of God.” 

So what are these secrets Jesus only dared to share with his closest followers? Teachings so revolutionary they threaten to dismantle institutional religion. Or in the Apostle Paul’s words, mysterious treasures hidden in jars of clay. We highly encourage you to read Thomas’s gospel to find out for yourself, but one mystery in particular stands out from all the rest for its ability to deconstruct the very foundation of faith. And it has to do with transforming one’s core identity.

In Thomas 3a and 3b, Jesus says, “The Kingdom is within you, and it is outside you. When you understand yourselves, you will be understood. And you will realize you are Sons of the living Father.” Later on, Jesus is even more explicit: “He who will drink from my mouth (accept my teachings) will become like me. I myself shall become he, and the things that are hidden will be revealed to him.” 

Suddenly we have a clue as to why this secret gospel was called “the gospel of the twin,” because Jesus is saying in not so uncertain words that each of us is his twin. Like him, we come from God and will return to God. We possess the same Divine image, the same sacred spark. Unbeknownst to us, the Divine light is already shining deep within, it’s just buried under layers of theological lies (e.g. original sin). “Being Sons of the Father is to be like Jesus himself, a status one does not attain anew but that one realizes one has always had,” explains author Stevan Davies. 

Our first name isn’t sinner; it is son and daughter. The task set before us in Thomas’ gospel is to begin the journey of self-discovery, to seek and find the treasure of our true selves, hidden all these years by deprecating dogma of institutional religion. And here’s the beautiful part. Once you find your true self, you will also find God since Christ has made his home within you. 

To our evangelical ears, this sounds like blasphemy. Even Thomas thought so. After Jesus took him aside privately and uttered these words to him, the other disciples asked him, “What did Jesus say to you?” And Thomas replied, "If I tell you one of the things which he told me, you will pick up stones and throw them at me.” 

The Gospel of Thomas isn’t for everyone. But if you are ready, if you have eyes to see and ears to hear, set out on your quest for truth, one that will take you not outward to some external authority or denominational religion, but inward to discover the divine secrets within you.

A Reflection

Spend time this week reading The Gospel of Thomas slowly. Meditate on its mysteries. What phrases sound familiar to you? What sayings of Jesus are new and unsettling to you? Read one saying at a time. Use the saying as a sort of prayer. Repeat it over to yourself a few times, paying attention to what the Spirit is trying to reveal to you. Then, sit in silence allowing the words to pour over your soul, revealing to you their deep, hidden secrets.

What We’re Reading, Listening To, Watching

Melanie

• Listening to: The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune

• Watching: Mare of Easttown (HBO)

Gary Alan

• Reading: The Book of Mystical Chapters: Meditations on the Soul’s Ascent, from the Desert Fathers and Other Early Christian Contemplatives by John Anthony McGuckin

• Watching: “What Do ‘Secret Gospels’ Suggest About Jesus and His Teachings?” lecture by Elaine Pagels