Ep. 10: What happened to Joshua Harris? The I Kissed Dating Goodbye author shares about purity culture and deconstructing his faith
Show Notes
Episode Summary
Why did Joshua Harris, the original face of purity culture, eventually recant everything he once believed? What does he believe now? And what does that mean for the millions of Christians who adopted his stances? Melanie and Gary Alan sit down with the author to talk about his faith journey thus far, complete with its successes, losses, reversals, and apologies.
Bio
Joshua Harris spent the first 40 years of his life promoting what he now describes as narrow, controlling, fear-based religion. Today he advocates for people’s freedom to change, grow, and walk away from systems and beliefs that no longer fit them. He wants to see religious and non-religious communities healthier.
Comparing himself to the fictional character Benjamin Button who lived a backward life, Joshua became a best-selling author at age 21, the lead pastor of a mega-church at age 30, and only at age 40 attended a graduate school of theology.
Joshua is a wordsmith and storyteller. Drawing from his background as an author, a TEDx speaker, and a documentary filmmaker, he runs the creative agency, Clear & Loud, which creates marketing content and websites for businesses. He also provides message-clarity coaching for thought-leaders and personal brands who want to spread their ideas to the world.
Follow Josh on Instagram and Twitter to get updates on podcast!
Quotables
“All I could see, when it came to Christianity, were the human machinations of power and greed.” (tweet this)
“Affirming LGBTQIA+ people is a great way to get evangelicals to leave you alone.” (tweet this)
“Wherever the importance of devotion is celebrated and measured, there will be an impulse for zealous people to say, ‘We can do more.’ And in that context, it’s very difficult for moderating voices to gain the floor.” (tweet this)
“Nobody wants to be person that stands up and says, ‘Guys, chill out! Don’t take this so seriously!’ Because what are they at that moment? Lukewarm.” (tweet this)
“In many Christian circles, if you can do something that comes across a little strange or is criticized, it actually affirms your sense of doing the right thing, of being persecuted with Jesus.” (tweet this)
“Whenever we get to a place where we say, ‘We have it all figured out, our castle is so perfect!’ that’s usually when we say, ‘You know what? Our castle is so perfect, let’s attack that other castle across the way.’” (tweet this)
“Whether you’re an atheist or a Christian, we can all be in process.” (tweet this)
“When we’re in process and willing to question, it makes us open to other human beings.” (tweet this)
Timestamps and References
[03:25]—An apology and Josh’s story of coming to a place of questioning the purity culture he once espoused
[07:10]—How Josh started questioning his faith too
[12:36]—Josh’s current thoughts on what constitutes a healthy sexual ethic
[15:57]—Why Josh also unpublished his book Not Even a Hint, which was about how to avoid lust
[20:50]—How the homeschool subculture contributed to Josh’s fame and success
[21:50]—Why more extreme voices typically win in many Christian subcultures in the U.S.
[25:17]—Foxe’s Book of Martyrs
[27:00]—Thoughts on Jesus and fame
[28:45]—Pride, guilt, and shame
[31:40]—Where Josh’s spirituality and faith are right now
[33:08]—What gives Josh hope for the future of faith
[36:00]—Rapid Fire questions
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Credits
This episode was produced by The Sophia Society. Music is by Faith in Foxholes, and sound engineering is by Joshua Mudge.
